Comments on: How Long Have You Been Looking And How Many Proposals Did You Get?

By: m

Sun, 14 Feb 2010 14:54:53 +0000

1. I haven’t really begun actively looking. I joined a few online matrimonial sites in 2006.

2. I have received 3 proposals, 1 through a cousin and 2 through websites none of which panned out.

3. 2-3 years

By: amatullah

amatullah — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 17:35:45 +0000

1-haven’t been actively looking
2-received about 5-6 proposals (total)
3-probably within or by 2 years insha’Allah

By: 7777

7777 — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 07:42:33 +0000

searching for 5yrs
1 proposal
inshaAllah this year

By: hamda

hamda — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 02:52:02 +0000

1. Since I have academic expectations to fulfill I can’t even think about getting married or even hint that I want to. I’m 22 by the way and personally am open to anything because I feel this is more important than getting a degree. Khayr, InshAllah.

2. Two.

3. I can easily see that I’d be around 30 when I’d be getting married. Allahu ‘Alam. But 95% of my friends/acquaintances (my age or younger) are either engaged or married.

By: Patience

Patience — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 07:53:35 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

Last four years since I ended my studies.

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

Many (30+) since my undergraduate, some have actually come to my house but most I couldn’t accept as I know either it doesn’t match my criteria or that of my family, like his job, education etc.. I kept wondering how come nobody could fit in the criteria.

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married? Use an average from all the sisters who got married around you. (Yes, only Allah knows the future. I just want to understand what your REALISTIC expectation is).
Maybe one year

By: Dots

Dots — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 14:48:26 +0000

1. 1 year
2. 1
3. 1 year

By: ummzaynah

ummzaynah — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 06:04:01 +0000

i have ben divorced for almost 6 years. I have been actively looking for about 3 1/2- 4 years. I have been engaged once since my divorce and almost got engaged a second time 2 years ago. I honestly don’t know when or if “MR. Right” will ever. I have attended a couple of weddings since my divorce. Most recently my brother’s. I have just about given up hope that i will ever find anyone. It’s literally like looking for a needle in a haystack. There are no decent, good, practicing brothers.

By: rayhana

rayhana — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 19:22:16 +0000

looking actively ( although its not acceptable culture wise and by family) since I was 25 am 30 now.

- around 8-9 and one I was quite serious but refused due to family problems

hopefully soon possible

By: Me

Me — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 06:45:53 +0000

1) Im 24 and i’ve been actively looking for 2.5 years

2) Around 7. There was 1 that was very serious

3) subhanallah, maybe 1-5 years. Allah knows best

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 05:50:42 +0000

1) 3 years

2) Only one serious proposal

3) In 2 years insha’Allah

By: anam

anam — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 01:00:54 +0000

1. Haven’t really actively been searching. It’s not culturally acceptable in my community and family.

2. Around 9. One excellent match mashallah but didn’t work out due to the families.

3. Whenever Allah (swt) wills, but I hope this year inshallah.

Please make du’a for me.

By: Muslimah

Muslimah — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 00:17:27 +0000

1. My family & I have been looking for about 6 months now – but not seriously looking as I am only 18.
2. I have received one proposal before we started looking and a few recommendations since we have started looking.
3. Most sisters i know got married after uni at around 24-27, however I would like to get married while I’m in uni from 20-23.

By: Sister

Sister — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 21:54:48 +0000

1. looking for the last 7 yrs

2. around 3 proposals

3. Only Allah knows best, but I would really like to be married in a year especially since I’ve increased my pool of letting trustworthy know I’m really interested and working harder to expose myself to more opportunities….

By: yas

yas — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 21:49:03 +0000

Haven’t started looking

another 5 years

By: Aish

Aish — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 05:48:01 +0000

1. If you mean actively searching as in (asking someone if they know someone) I think a month or so.

2. 2 proposals but they did not go nowhere

3. I am hoping at the age of 22/23, (I am 21 right now)

By: JA

JA — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 05:40:14 +0000

Assalaamu Alaykum,

I’ve been looking for the past two years.

I’ve got three proposal.

Allah knows best, but i think it would be another year before i get married.

Jazaka Allahu khayr.

By: anonymous

anonymous — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 04:39:50 +0000

Ive been thinking seriously about marriage for about 4 years now, but prob “actively” looking for only one year.

I’ve received one serious proposal. He wasn’t my type.

I want to be married within 1 year insha’Allah.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 04:33:57 +0000

1. I’ve been active for about the last 2 months now.

2. I have recieved 2. The first brother looked like he was practising, but gave me bad vibe from the start so I quickly said No. Then next brother was somebody whom a friend referred to me.

3. Most sisters around me who have gotten married recently MashaAllah were under 25. But for me again Allahu’Alam when I will get married.

By: Sabr

Sabr — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 03:57:10 +0000

1) I’ve been actively looking to marry for the past 3 months, and I would like to marry sooner rather than later
2) Since I have been ‘actively’ looking I have not received any proposals
3. 5 years

By: m

Thu, 04 Feb 2010 02:04:54 +0000

1. 2 1/2 yrs, many of my friends got married around that time so they tried to “help out”
2. 7-8 when i was first “active(looking” but they’ve been coming less and less since i’ve gotten lazy… im studying and it alone takes all of my time so that is why i havent been putting anymore time into looking for “mr. right”
3. i’d like to say within 3 yrs inshallah but since i’ve gotten lazy i honestly don’t know.

By: CanadianMuslima

CanadianMuslima — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 01:05:05 +0000

Salam,

1. Haven’t been actively looking
2. Many proposals in the last 12 months but only one that may be a possible match. Allaah knows best.
3. InshaAllah I’d like to be married in the next 2-3 years

By: Meme

Meme — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 23:57:52 +0000

Salaam, for the past 10 years i was with someone who has bee promising to marry me, so the years just passed by and I never felt like anyone significant in his life. I had about 3 proposals I was never happy with them anyway. Now I dnt get any and I don’t k ow how to be as I was with someone for so long. Anyway eventually he didn’t want to be with me.I dnt know bow long I’ll be waiting. I feel like so much time has already
passed. I just don’t know how to be. I just feel like an idiot.

By: Khadija

Khadija — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 23:42:22 +0000

1. I have been on and off looking to find someone for 6 years but I’m not active enough and my past has hindered me…

2. 4-5 interested parties I think.

3. It will take lot more than a year… but hoping it won’t.

By: Jannat

Jannat — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 23:14:43 +0000

I have had the intention of actively looking for mr. Right but I never had the time or energy. Meanwhile I am caught up with my daily routine of working and what not and I am still getting proposals. But here’s the catch, they are not muslims. I happen to work in a factory with 90 percent male workforce. The good, the bad, the hideous. And all are non Muslims. It’s like the verse in a famous poem water water everywhere but not a drop to drink. You get the idea.

By: fajrlover

fajrlover — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 22:55:37 +0000

1 6 months
2 3 serious ones
3 if it was based on other sisters experience, it depends on who they are, some within 1 year is common and others 6 years would be normal. Cultural factors seem to come into play for some sisters who feel compelled to consider a limited scope of brothers, as opposed to those who don’t care about cultural background

By: sara

sara — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 22:37:53 +0000

How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)
1 year

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)
3

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?
More than a year!

By: umm Maryam

umm Maryam — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 22:27:24 +0000

I am 27 yrs old
I have been looking since i was 23 (so 4 yrs)
I have received around 25 – 30 proposals, Around 10 came round to my house, 1 broken engagement.

i realistically see myself married in the next 2 yrs, inshallah.

By: aamatullah

aamatullah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 22:22:58 +0000

salaam alaykum
1.for the last 3 years
2.3 real proporsal
3.in the next closest time thogh ALLAH knows the right time for me which is the best.

By: Maryam

Maryam — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:56:27 +0000

1. around 3 months

2. I am not sure if these can be called “proposal”. But I have discussed with 2 brothers who said they were interested, but each time, things happened, and it never went any far. These discussions were not even carried within proper islamic boundaries (by webcam, emails, al hamdullilah I never physically met them)

I have never received actual, formal, official proposal per say (i.e. sent to my parent …)

3. From what is all going on around me, and seen the circumstances I am in, I will say 3 years (till I finish my PhD al hamdulillah).
But I REFUSE to face the reality, and hope I will get married in a time very soon (inshaAllah). As for me, studies does not exclude marriage.

And the Lord of the Worlds know best

Sorry for going on and on, I am apparently very talkative, or “writative” should I say lol

By: Imaan

Imaan — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:44:38 +0000

1. I have been actively searching 4 months but at the moment I have stopped due to the commitment of studies. InshaAllah I intend to ask others in my social network to look for a practicing brother/prospective husband after I finish.

I just wanted to share with you that I am a divorcee and thought I’ll never marry again due to the stigma attached of being a divorcee. Alhamdulillah there has been a few interests but most of the time I had to turn down due to my studies. Only Allah knows best so I left it and see what happens.

2. Within that time, I probably had 5 proposals. Thats ranging from directly, third party and matromonial site.

3. Within 3 years InshaAllah.

By: Hooded beauty :)

Hooded beauty :) — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:33:31 +0000

1- I have been actively searching for about 2-3yrs. But only this year have i truly put my all in it and your seminars are perfect. They helped me see all the mistakes I have been making.
2- I have not received any “real” proposals. But I have been approached for the wrong reasons (non marriage relationships) and got 3 fake proposals from men who didn’t even know my name and literally met me that day yet had the audacity to say “let’s get married”. Only looking for a “baby making machine”, as my friends call it. They didn’t talk to me for more then a minute. Really just a minute and they claim we should marry. Thus I don’t count them as proposals.
3- Well for my friend circle there are a few who have fiancés but don’t plan to get married for years. At the same time there are some who are single and not interested in marriage yet and then there are some like me, looking and have been looking for some time. But personally I pray to be married or have a fiancé within 1-2 yrs. I’m not top priority in my family or circle of friends because people keep assuming I’m engaged or already married; thinking things are going good for me. I don’t know were they get their information from but its not good if potential brothers hear it

By: brownie

brownie — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 21:02:22 +0000

1) I have seriously recently started looking husband. Within a two months

2) I have not received any proposals- Inshallah it will soon

3) I hoping within 6-12 months to get married.

By: Sarah

Sarah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 20:47:59 +0000

1. For the last year
2. 5+ proposals
3. Inshallah I think, hope and pray to Allah (SWT) that I get married this year or next year inshallah.

Please remember me in your duas all of you and i’ll include you all in mine.
May Allah give all of us the best partner for each of us in this world and the next…Aameen!

By: deen

deen — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 19:56:27 +0000

Salam all

1. 2 years

2. 2 proposals

3. I am divorced for 3 years. So makes it harder I am not sure, going through this all over again is over whelming. I have been seriously looking for the past year, I have gotten 2 so far.

but what I learned from experience is praying to Allah and making dua. I have tried aunti connection, going to Islamic classes and Internet. As they say it will happen when it is meant to happen and it will happen when you least expect it.

Allah has his own way planning things, make dua and praying is the best. InshaAllah May allah bless all the sister in this forum and around the world with good spouse who we are meant to be with. Ameen!

By: iklas

iklas — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 18:37:37 +0000

1. 15 years
2. more than 15
3. i dont know

By: Muslimah

Muslimah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 17:46:36 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)
Almost three years

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

None

I doubt i will ever get married until muslim men stop being so shallow and start looking at my deen and character which i have alhamdulilah rather then my physical disability.

Just one more thing, i noticed alot when people talk about those who are having difficulties getting married no one ever brings us disabled people in the topic, its like we don’t even matter and that we don’t deserve to have this wonderful gift called marriage.

By: Husna

Husna — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 17:42:51 +0000

Bismillah

1) Two years.

2) Two proposals

3) This is year InshaAllah…..(bi iznillah)

By: Mujahida

Mujahida — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 17:35:52 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right?
– I’ve been doing the “I’m not actively looking, but if a good brother came along I’d consider” thing since I was 16. I’m now 19.

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)
– 3 official proposals, 1 brother I know was interested however I’d gotten engaged at that point. I’m now single again after 2 years of being engaged, and would advise my sisters of 2 things:

a)Before saying yes to a brother, always ask yourself.. although this guy is totally awesome, is marrying him going to be good for my relationship with Allah? (Something I realised 2 years too late, and wish I’d asked myself at the beginning)

b)Don’t get into long engagements, go for the contract as soon as you feel comfortable, as the longer the unofficial stuff continues, the longer Shaytaan has to get in there and cause trouble.

Alhamdullillah at all times

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

– Looking at the sisters around me, many are hitting their late 20’s and are still not married; as for myself, I have a strong support network Alhamdullillah so I’d like to think it may take no longer than 2-3 years.

In the end: Qadr Allah, wa mashaa fa’ala

By: muslimgirl

muslimgirl — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 16:51:39 +0000

aslamoalaikum, its very unfortunate that we who call ourselves muslims are not accepting someone who has a disability or some kind of problem without thinking that it can happen to anyone of us and its all in allah’s hands. i have been searching for last three years but got no positive response because of my disability. please help and educate our muslim men and their families.

By: muslimgirl

muslimgirl — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 16:48:35 +0000

aslamoalaikum, i am searching for last three years but got two but due to my disability their families were not accepting of me.

By: AN

AN — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 15:56:33 +0000

1. About 3 years almost.
2. About 10. Only 2 were of a serious nature (even though they didn’t meet the religion criteria as much as my family and I would have liked). 1 pulled the disappearing act on us, the other after months of stalling finally said the guy wasn’t interested.
3. Hopefully 1 year.

By: Amani

Amani — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 15:20:47 +0000

1) 8 years
2) over 10 proposals
3) I pray Allah (sw) to be a.s.a.p. as I am growing older. But with this extremely high rate of uneducated and uncompromising men, it might never happen! I have a lovely daughter who is 13 y/o now, and all proposals I had before were either from: unserious married men, or unwilling men to be a fatherly figure for my daughter even if he has his own kids whom he wants me to their mother because they carry his name but my daughter is not carrying his , or from uneducated rude men….and so on.

By: naj..

naj.. — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 15:04:12 +0000

I am 19 years old but i was looking to get married at the age of 22 Insha Allah.

At the moment, i’m not really thinking about getting married but before marraige, i am aiming to be more active around the house and to increase my faith Insha Allah.

Remember me in your dua sisters.

As salamu alaikum. XXX

By: Amazed

Amazed — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:59:57 +0000

My parents have been actively looking for the last 4 years. (so they say). I myself have only started looking a year ago.

I have had two serious proposals in the last 4 years.

I would like to get married as soon as possible inshallah.

By: freida j

freida j — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:57:45 +0000

1. My parents have been actively looking for me since I was about 16. I’m 20 now.

2. There have been maybe 10-15 proposals. Nothing got too serious, within exchanging information either one or both of us decided this wasn’t what we were looking for.

3. Within this year inshaAllah. i’m in talks with a brother, and we’ve decided that we want to get married. his family knows and approves, and my family knows and approves. He seems to be having a hard time telling his mom. and despite being a good Muslim practicing brother, he’s a bit of a commitment phobe. I’m waiting on him, so that we can set a date.

By: Hafiza

Hafiza — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:55:15 +0000

1l 2 1/2 years and before that i was single too..

2. i have got none proposals till now..

3. i really dont knw maybe many years..

I have been busy with studying and my parents dont like the fact if i study that i find some1 ..even though im 29 now.. my parents are not very religious more traditional or cultural i would say.. so my parents say find yourself someone bc they was forced to get married and was never happy with each other.
I started talkin to a bro in 2007 when he said he was a muslim i thought i think i found the right person… but then he changed his mind and said 1 and half years later that he’s not.. the problem is i fell in love with him even though i didnt want to i wanted to find a husband for myself.. through the internet bc i thought some1 that converted just to islam could be on the same page as i am and could treat me justly bc i try working on becoming a better human being..or a better muslima and its hard when everyone and life around u doesnt support u they want to hinder u.. so i became frustrated.. untill now i haven’t found the right guy i have’t made really good experiances till now.. to be honest!!!

i have only two muslima girlfriends but most of them are so in their cultures rather than what is real islam.. or what is right and just..and beloving to allah… and my family too.. and thats sad..

By: Sulayfah

Sulayfah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:34:59 +0000

1) since 2006 just over 3 years.

2) I’v had 3 proper proposals and a few silly ones..brothers who didnt ask properly and beat around the bush :S

3) Sisters who got married around me my freinds and community when they were 21/22. and they had not been actively looking… they just had luck, men approached there families without them doing any work. subhanallah. they literally sat at home and waited. I think i will be waiting another 3-5 years before i meet someone i could settle down with i am 23 now so ill be in my late 20’s :S. I dont want to i would prefer within the next year…But i have not met anyone serious in thier deen and i would not compromise on this ever.

Jazakalalh khier

By: jokster

jokster — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:34:27 +0000

I haven’t really been looking until all my friends got married. I have thought about it more. I would say I have been open to the idea for a year or so. As for proposals, one real serious one and maybe 3-4 attempts at communication. I don’t know how long it may take, only Allah knows. What I would like, maybe in a year. The trend I have seen in my community, less than a year.
Salam

By: Zainab

Zainab — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:22:22 +0000

Asalaamu alaikum wr wb

1). About 8 months.
2). 10 or so, but only 2 or 3 worth considering.
3). Insha’allah within 2 to 4 years, depending on University and location.

Wa Iyaki! ^_^

By: zaliha harun

zaliha harun — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 14:13:03 +0000

my husband had gone to alam barzah 2006,
2010,trying to find the right ALLAH salve to improve my iman.
i’ve 2 proposal in 2009,really the man is not in my way of life towards ALLAH and Rasullah guiding.
if ALLAH give the right man,that’s from ALLAH to really myself surrender.LAHAULAWALAQUWATAILLABILLAH

By: sally

sally — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 13:42:03 +0000

1) been activly searching for 1.5 years
2) from age 23-25 about 3 people asked me if i want to get married cuz they had some1 in mind for me but I said no (didn’t even give them a chance to see me or propose) because i was so stressed about getting into grad school and I wasn’t gonna start thinking about marriage until after getting a spot in grad school. After I got into grad school (age 25), I got only 1 actual proposal, and it didn’t work out, and now I am almost 26 and didn’t get anything since then. I regret missing those first 3 chance, but oh well, can’t change the past.

3) I hope to get married right away, but realistically, with the severe scarcity in proposals that i am experiencing right now, I think might take me 2 years to get married (hopefully not more than that inshallah)

By: mk

mk — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 13:41:17 +0000

a) 1 year
b) 2 proposals – (I have seen many other guys but my parents have refused most of them)
3) within in a year hopefully

By: Muslimah

Muslimah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 13:33:29 +0000

1) Six to ten years, off and on (I’ve wanted to get married for a long time but didn’t know how to go about it at first. My family isn’t Muslim and doesn’t get involved in these matters.)
2) Several inquiries, two serious proposals
3) It’s frustrating at times, but in my community sisters who don’t have any family helping them usually remain unmarried for many years, easily nine years or more. Let’s say I’ve been looking for six years. Then I have at least three more years if I want to find someone who’s passionate about his Islam….

By: D

Wed, 03 Feb 2010 13:25:12 +0000

1) 2 months
2) 7
3) 1 year we Allahu Allam

By: Psssss

Psssss — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:54:44 +0000

Assalamu alaykum wr wb

Hah I was searching Right one 2 years, then got wrong one, then devorced and now I am already devorced 7 months
alhamdulillah

I got 100 proposals…but that is nothing serious. People are not serious. Men now a days are ‘trying’
After a while they do not feel lucky with their chosen one so they search more…usually they say you can ask for devorce any time. So I am trying to be faar away from such ppl.
Now is also modern kind of marriage ‘misyar’. So people are searching bad girls around then living with them misyar then devorcing them and searching others…etc.

But that is in world I live in. I do not know how is there on the West now.
Also I cannot accept ppl who ask me after 2 days for marriage. Wow I am not impressed with their proposals…they think like God will send love between them and wife, if not then they will search more!! lol how lucky guys with shari3a rules.
I am sure they do not understand shari3ah at all.

It is ok for men to marry more wifes but not on way they do. they have one and search around…look at every single girl, cht with 1000 of them..all because they have right to marry more.
Where is Islam there??? I do not rekognize it in such actions.

And yeah…Sisters if you want marry from Arabic world and he say he is devorce ask from who: from first and only wife or from 3th or 4th etc.
yeah they r really devorced but from their last wife…not from all. so they are not liars!!!! NOT at all! LOL

also if boy swear he have never been with any girl…ask what abt boys?? you never know today…ppl are getting crazy. astagfirullah
I had bad expirience so that is why i told you this. take care.

When will I marry?? Allahu alam. If I think abt last moment I can say after 6 months or after 1,5 year etc. when my kids have school holiday…I cannot in between. so all good ppl who asked me to marry for 2 days were not smart…I have to think on my kids future not just on marriage. I was planing to meet one good for 6 months or oneyear..but it seems that ppl are to good or to bad. nowhere the middle. so i am still waiting that normal one. who will meet me, give me time and do not cheat me LOL

thank you

By: Chittakookar

Chittakookar — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:47:05 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

5 years

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

2 I considered

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

InshAllah I am making du’a that it will be by the end of 2010 (if I follow practimate advice!!) But Allahu Wa Alim…Allah (SWT) is the best of Planners.

By: Bubblegum

Bubblegum — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:16:28 +0000

1) Ive been looking since i was 18 now going to be 20 soon inshaAllah

2) ive had quite a few people ask me, one asked me directly at uni and about 8 people have rang and done enquirys…some of which we have seen in person….khayr none of them actually went through Although i seriously thought one of them would go through but qadr Allah it didnt

3) i really want to get married by the summer ideally inshaAllah. If not then defintely by next summmer inshaAllah

By: Muslimah

Muslimah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:15:38 +0000

1) I have been actively looking for 2 years

2) I have recieved 3 proposals so far all practising brs mashallah but didnt work out

3) Inshallah I think relistically might be another year or 2 but want to get married inshallah before that

By: Me

Me — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:10:30 +0000

I have been searching for the past six years. Before I started observing the niqaab (3years ago), I had 12 proposals but since, I’ve had about 4. I think it will take me about 4 more months to get married insha Allah.

By: NoName

NoName — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 11:55:13 +0000

1- 10 years
2- Two
3- Everyone around here doesn’t seem to take long except me.

Allah knows best.

By: watermelon

watermelon — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 11:24:09 +0000

a) 3 years
b) 10
c) anywhere from the coming few months to 2-3 years!

By: FindingBrNemo

FindingBrNemo — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:41:53 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

My family and I have been actively searching for 3 years (give or take a few months)

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

I have had around 15 to 16 proposals – when i say proposals…i mean meetings with prospective brothers. out of the 15, I was only keen on the ONE!

Inshallah it should be this year!! lol… average of friends and ppl around me is 25/26 …although i have sisters around me who are nearing the big 3-0!

By: Amah

Amah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:35:43 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right?

3 years

2. How many proposals did you get since then?

One

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

Taking an average is quite hard as I know sisters who’ve been looking for much longer than me and still are and others who were not actively or passively looking and got married while still in University. So my answer is I don’t know.

By: Zawane

Zawane — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:26:03 +0000

a) Since the last webinar, I’ve put myself on the “marriage market” which was not really the case for the last 5 years. I was secretly wishing for my friends to get married before me (I guess I was fearing the evil eye because my friends usually envy me for no particular reason – may Allah forgive me for that statement). Now that they are all married (and thanks to you sister Megan mashallah for opening my eyes on the mistakes that I was making) I am ready (with ALLAH’s Will) to become a wife and a mother inshallah !

b) none of the proposals that I’ve received were official (meaning men coming to my parents…) but I had several marriage plans (four for sure) and the most serious one was dismissed by my parents when I told them I wanted to get married with that man (that was 5 years ago and He still want to marry me but I am not quite happy with his deen – ALLAH’s knows BEST!)

c) I am longing for a determined brother who will come and ask my parents in no time – So getting married within a week or a month is something feasible to me !!! AMIN

By: imaan

imaan — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:14:43 +0000

salaam alaikum
1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

1 month

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

didn’t meet anyone YET,

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

Most of my friends are married but because I have a child from a previous marriage I think it might take about a year! or more. but its not because I wont have a brother propose I think its because I want to feel right with someone, to have some kind of comfort and attraction with him,for my child to like him and him be great and patient with my child and accept me with a child in the first place and the odds of that happening are slim but of course Allah can do anything I just worry I wont meet or be introduced to someone who I will like or find attractive enough to say yes to.

By: ID

ID — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 10:10:36 +0000

1. I actually have not yet started searching for one but my mind is on it.

2. I have received two unoffical proposal but i was not ready for marriage.

3. I guess next year when i return to my home land by the grace of Allah, i am in a foreign nation doing my graduate degree.

By: shazzy

shazzy — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 09:08:21 +0000

1) Been lookin for about 16 months. 2) Had about 7 proposals 3) I'm 23 now, so inshaAllah hoping to get married by 24, most sisters I know get married within two years of searching

By: WR

WR — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 09:07:42 +0000

1. I’ve been looking for around 3.5 yrs.

2. Since I’ve been looking online, I’ve been contacted by many brothers but I’ve spoken to about 30 brothers or more. Actually, of those brothers, I can think of very few who I really liked but there’s always 1 or 2 things that I think differently about so I decline the proposal.

3. Many of my friends and colleagues who are my age and older are also still single so based on that, I think I’ve already passed the age to get married. I could get married soon if I wanted to marry for the sake of marriage but I actually want an understanding husband who will like me for me. THAT I think is almost impossible to find the older you get so I doubt I’m going to get married. And this is me being realistic. However, if by some Mercy of Allah (swt), I do find someone, I think the earliest I can get married is in 1 yr.

By: 999

999 — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 09:05:46 +0000

1. Been wanting to marry since 19, I would say I have been actively looking i.e. told my parents, asking around my friends, generally keeping my eye out for prospective husband. I am 26 now

2. No proposals that made it thru the door, prospective husbands I found that I presented information to mum around 4-6.

3. Inshaa Allah within 1 year.

By: Honey

Honey — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:58:25 +0000

Assalam aliikum

1. Been looking for 6 months ( i am 25)
2. Have had about 10 proposals, but they have been unsuitable for me. Currently, there is a serious proposal i am considering so i’m kinda hoping insha’allah that this will be good because so far he has ticked all my boxes
3. maybe within the next 6 months and Allah knows best.

jazakullahu khairan

By: Sandy

Sandy — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:42:55 +0000

1.- I am not active looking for a husband… college and work keep me very busy and with no time I’, affraid

2.- I don’t have or had any proposal either

3.- I really don’t know… right now I just feel so sad and I feel I’m never going to get married… this year I will be 27 years and I don’t have any prospects, connections with muslim brothers, I have nothing at all

By: Sher

Sher — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:37:31 +0000

Assalamu Alaikum Wa RAhmatullah Megan,

1 – I’ve been searching since November 2009.

2 – I have got many many proposals ( though I am a divorcee ) Alhamdulillah. But I am being very careful to choose for a man who is religeous, family bound, professional and understanding. I seem to have finally found such a man…let’s see how things work out!!!!

3 – If this alliance works, I will be getting married by the coming March, Insha Allah. If not..I have to start over again and maybe within this year, I’ll get married…It’s all in Allah’s hands. Pray for me….

Jazak Allahul Khair,

Sher.

By: TBA

TBA — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:35:29 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

Personally i have been searching(OR wanted) to settle down since the age of 12 and now i am 30.I want to share an intersting story here.when i was 14,had some far away relatives visiting in the summer holidays,and i just had this notion that i need to be my bestest so that i can get myself a proposal.no one ever talked about marriage or anything in my family it was just my gut feeling.infact anyone talking about marriage was scorned upon. we were supposed to be concentrating on our studies and aiming high in our worldly lives. and you wont believe it i found out years later that they had actually proposed for their brother.my parents were obviously shocked and they must have refused.lolz. i was good at everything,my studies,managing the house,cooking,looking after my siblings,you name it and subhanAllah i excelled in almost everything.
the topic of marriage was a complete no no until my graduataion.i was 24 by that time.dont think got any proposals between that period.when i went to university i dreamt of someone proposing to me and again unconsciously i was seeking to settle down.couldnt ever bring the topic with my parents for fear of humiliation.we were brought up with the ideology that we had to be very successful professional women and that thinking of marriage was something done by females who were academically poor or had nothing constructive to pursue in their lives.AllahuAkbar!!
Well now my parents have been looking,ever since my graduation that is about 6 yrs now….

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

got one proposal a year back by way of giving an ad in the matrimonial section of the daily newspaper.i refused cause he was not religious,and for me religious means atleast praying five times a day.during the six year period there was one more porposal from a brother i met through chatting.obviously i hit my low at that time,in a funny way not that i was depressed.and so i ended up on the wrong side of the road.within three days of chatting, the brother propsed,cause he was impressed by someone who was modest,educated,and not like the other girls on the chatting scenario.i refused for a year than accepted thinking he was religiously strong and of good character.well a few months we chatted never met though,alhamdulilah for that,but i realized he didnt pray wasnt that practicing but was looking for a religious wife.i ended it up.

well,allahualam for the answer to this question.from your webinars and some of the videos i have come to realize that alhamdulilah i have most of the qualities that religious brothers look for in their wives.i am professional But am looking to settle down,would love Not to work and give all that i can to my family(future inshaAllah)…..for the sake of Allah,as an ibadah.the problem is lack of networking,from my side as well as from my parents side, and i simply dont know how to overcome it.where should i network other than the internet??.i believe, from experience, that internet is a very unreliable source when looking/searching for husbands.

so i pray to be settled inshAllah by the age of 32 maximum.in my wildest dreams would love it, if it happened by the end of this year.

my apologies for makng it sooo long

By: flamingo

flamingo — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:10:55 +0000

two years
and one proposal
and around 2 or 3 years more to get married

By: hmhm

hmhm — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:08:01 +0000

Assalamu Aleichem Warahmatu Allah Wabarakatuhu,

Firstly, thank you for asking honest question sisters. If I try to answer your question, it’s always in my head and heart to find Mr. Right, but as being a woman it is hard to propose a man which I think that is the nature of woman not to propose a man. Therefore, to be honest with you I never try to search a man, because I always believe in that it’s will of Allah and it will come one day Insha’Allah, which I don’t know when. Secondly, I had 12 proposals from men who interested in me, however I could not even got one out of them. Thirdly, yet again Allah knows when. But as soon as possible with the will of Allah I will get married when Mr. Right knock my door Insha’Allah, lol I hope I didn’t of the topic.

Jazaki Allahu khayr

By: s

Wed, 03 Feb 2010 08:04:49 +0000

1. I have not been actively searching my parents just wait for someone to approach them.

2.I am not sure about proposals, I’m keeping this up to my parents because that’s how it has been with my other sisters. But from what I remember very few.

3. I am 27 and I would rather not think when I will be getting married. Just so there is no disappointment if it fails to happen by that time.

By: Dora

Dora — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 07:46:06 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

Active search began almost a year ago. I have been flipping back and forth about wanting to get married and not since I was 19! When I would get angry, it was all about nobody is going to marry me! I might as well become a crazy cat lady! lol But Alhamdulillah around 21 I grew out of that phase, and have been composed. So 1 year!

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

Um…Ive recieved 4 before I began wearing my hijab from aunties etc. Alhamdulillah when I begain wearing my hijab about 8 months a go, I have recieved two proposals from ‘aunties’ who have brothers or relatives etc. and one proposal online.

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

Realistically, I don’t see myself getting married for another 3 years or so! We have a shortage of males these days! Also, those who did get married have very different lifestyles and social networks than myself and my family

By: Sweety

Sweety — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 07:42:00 +0000

- Been looking for the past eight months.

- Received one very good proposal but things didn’t work out between the families. Infact the parents were taking so long to proceed that we decided to depart from each other to protect ourselves from getting into a haraam relationship. I’m still a little confused about that episode and feel that it may still work out. Allahu aalam!

- I’m 23 now, and wish to get married before the end of 2010.

By: Little Bird

Little Bird — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 07:29:25 +0000

a) about five years

b) 10

c) Another two years or so

It’s not them, it’s me. Am not really ready to tie the knot. But practimate is helping me out.

By: Amatullah

Amatullah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:52:52 +0000

1. I’ve been actively looking since I was 18, I am now 22

2. Since then I have received 4 Serious proposals, only one whom actually practiced Islam minutely, mostly cultural proposals that my parents wouldn’t have minded accepting.

3. I know its in Allah swt hands… but its really starting to drill a hole in my heart… I had hoped to have started a family (with children) by now.. Insha’allah Khair. The way its going at present it looks like it could be anywhere from 1-4 years

By: LaLa

LaLa — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:50:31 +0000

- I have been looking for 4 years.

- I have had brothers who have expressed interest and we have talked with my parents permission. Of those, there have probably been around 5-6. None of them really serious. Its usually a clear-cut no.

- I am hoping in the next 2 years.

By: ?????

????? — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:48:40 +0000

1. I have been actively about 5yrs.
2. i didnt get any proposal.Some of the sisters i know or heard about it get married at age 20 to 25 alhamdulillah.Allah knows what the future will be but Inshallah i want to married this year.

By: Hijabee4Lyfe

Hijabee4Lyfe — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:40:53 +0000

I have actively been looking for Mr. Right since Jan of 2009, beforehand I was engaged to a guy for a bout a year, so I guess it took some time for family friends and the community to realize I was no longer engaged.

Since then, I have had zero real proposals, some women told my mom about a guys who were good and they never followed up and some didn’t want a girl with hijab. I have talked to some people from matrimonial sites but nothing ever became really serious.

I think it will take me another year to get married! Theres seriously no guys and maybe since I’m looking for someone of my ethnicity (egyptian and religious) a very hard combo to find. I would really hope to get married by this summer, This month I am turning 25 and freaking out! lol

Almost all fo my friends around me have all gotten married in their late teens early twenties expect me, I feel cuz # 1 my parents insisted I finish college first and # 2 I feel that my parents have too many expectations/demands which basically ruined things during the 1st engagement I had.

As a result, I would have already been settled down and married if my engagement didn’t break off, so I feel that my marriage is so long over due.

By: hopeful

hopeful — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:10:17 +0000

I have started to officially look for a husband about a month ago, have not received any proposals but would like to get married asap

By: Muslimah

Muslimah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 06:08:03 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

I wouldn’t say that I have ever really actively searched, however, in the past couple of years(2-3)I have been more seriously thinking/hoping for results regarding this matter.

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)
Other than the previous(2-3) proposals through my family when they were here(they now live overseas), I have recently(within the past 2yrs) gotten 2 proposals.

Allahu a’alam, but I would say it usually takes about 2-3yrs.

By: SAMAN

SAMAN — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:35:05 +0000

Well i didn’t really look for purposal because very busy in studys i was about to get married with one of the guy back home who my dad likes but i rejected him because of some serious reasons and i was bieng forced into that marrige while i was engaged with him i got 2 proposal one full fill my requirement but not my parents one was surelly noooo. What i have done so far pray,duas, couldn’t do much because my parents were interested in the guy who i don’t like but Allhumdulillah they know the reason and they are on my side now but alottt of issues going on hoping for the best inshallah Allah knows best…..

By: prplqnn

prplqnn — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:32:56 +0000

1) I have been actively looking for five years now.
( sigh)

2) The proposals I got can not even be considered as such. so, no real proposals.

3) The sisters around me are in the same situation. So I really don’t know. I can only pray its no longer than another year.

By: sss

sss — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:08:18 +0000

1.since 4 years.
2.I always wanted to complete my graduation and then get married…so since i completed i got 3 proposals…One proposal is not finalised yet…
3. Allah knows best….i dont know…may be before i turn 30….Im doing my Ph.D now coz i got good opportunity to study here in canada…I am just hoping for the best..inshallah

By: student

student — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:07:41 +0000

1. 24 years old; family has been looking/considering for about 3 years.
2. 2 serious proposals, but they didn’t work out due to incompatibility and distance.
3. I dont know. It seems like most women around me are getting married at least by the time they turn 26 – sometimes sooner, sometimes later – it depends.

By: mew

mew — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:07:01 +0000

1. about 2 years

2. only one

3.well according to those around me i should have gotten married last year.. and i’m only 20!!!
i am praying inshAllah within the next 2 years…wallahu a3lam

By: student

student — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 05:04:44 +0000

1. I’m 24, my family has been considering marriage for me/looking at prospective matches for about 3 years.
2. 2 serious proposals, but they didn’t work out due to incompatibility and distance.
3. I don’t know. Most women around me tend to get married by the time they’re 26. Sometimes sooner, sometimes later – there is a wide range.

By: M

Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:58:11 +0000

I have been looking since I was 22 or something. I think I have gotten at least 15 proposals or something like that. Talked to a ton more brothers than that. I am 29. Kinda harder for me to nail a decent one down simply because I don’t have my family looking for me.

But I am hopeful. Inshallah I think I will get married this year. My luck has seemed to taken a turn, and I hope it stays that way.

By: Raven

Raven — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:46:05 +0000

1) I have been actively looking for about a month

2) I have one proposal but it is from a man from overseas who I met on a Muslim marriage website. It is a lot of trouble to marry someone from outside the U.S., so I am still praying about it.

3) I hope to be married, inshallah within one year.

By: Seven

Seven — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:41:40 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right?

6 years

2. How many proposals did you get since then?

Well I’ve had several inquiries about me through my family and other avenues, but I’ve only had one official proposal and alHamdulilah that didn’t work out! We had very different ideas on many things…

3. Looking at other sisters that you know who got married around you, how many more months or years do you think it will be before you get married?

Most people I know have gotten married from age 22 to 25. I’m 28 so inshaAllah I pray that I’ll be married by the time I turn 30.

By: BMuslimah

BMuslimah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:24:06 +0000

1. Not actively searching yet. I’m 18 and in college, but my parents are trying to look for someone for my older sister first.

2. 0

3. Allahu Alam. 5-6 years may be. Trend is between 23-26.

By: momin09

momin09 — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:10:14 +0000

1. My parents have given the green light to keep their eyes open for marriage for me about 6 months to 1 yr ago (I’m 20)

2. i’ve had about 5 proposals (2 more serious and realistic than the others, the others were recommendations from the family that werent very religious and much older)

3. I’d like to be married by 22 inshAllah (most girls in my community are married around 21-25 i guess)

By: h

Wed, 03 Feb 2010 04:05:37 +0000

1. How long have you been actively searching to find your Mr. Right? (be specific)

For about 2 years now (i’m 23)

2. How many proposals did you get since then? (be specific)

4 marriage proposals. Most of them did not meet standards, one brother is already married and I almost got married to a brother but he backed out in the last minute

Um I can’t really say because sisters in my community get married at all different ages but judging by the fact that I haven’t been able to find someone who is marriage material for this long I think I won’t find someone until I’m 26-28 sadly

By: Afaf

Afaf — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:58:45 +0000

Asslam U Alaikum Wa Rehmatulahi Wa Barakatuhu!!

1.I’ve not search.
2.I’ve gotton 2 purposal between 2 years.
3.1 or 2 years.
Jazakum Allah khair
Take Care

By: one0one

one0one — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:58:00 +0000

1. Not that active… But my mom and especially my little sis have been bugging me about it more than usual, as I’m 21 now.. I’d really want to get married, but there are two problems a) shortage of men in this city. Not a lot of practicing muslim men. There are some really really good ones, but I think they’re way out of my ‘league.’ I’m not deserving.
b) I’ve got a lot of me-fixing to do.

2. Zero. Never had one.

3. My realistic expectation is within 2 years inshaAllah… that will be ideal for me since I graduate this year from university. And then I can catch up on ‘myself’ with life and the perfecting my deen inshaAllah

By: tayibah

tayibah — Wed, 03 Feb 2010 03:57:39 +0000

1. I don’t “actively” look, meaning I don’t advertise myself or tell sisters to keep an eye out for me. I guess I depend on friends and/or community members to tell me about someone or tell someone about me. I am single, do I have to wear a sign that says “available”? My friend’s family didn’t for her or her sisters.

2. I have had one official proposal my whole life (I’m almost 30), meaning that other guys that people told us about aren’t even worthy of meeting. One did. That didn’t work out.

3. IF I starts “actively” looking, I don’t know. It could take 6 months if I happen to meet THE right guy soon and haphazardly, casually and randomly somewhere or up to 3 years if I use regular social networks and whatever. I am gauging this by what kind of friends I have seen get married, what kind of guys they marry, and how they met their guys.